That'll be one token please....

Ok so here is something that bothers me. My whole career in Commercial Real Estate (about 8yrs) I am ALWAYS the only Black person working for my companies. One company I wasn't the only Black person but all the others worked in customer service. I was one of 2 who weren't. The other guy was a very flamboyant gay man who moonlighted as a Diana Ross impersonator. But I am always the only Black person. My office now is comprised of 2 companies owned by the same person. My company occupies the left half another company is on the right. They have a brother over there, but he won't even give the customary head nod. He walks by me like "I can't look her in the eye or else they might think we're in cahoots."

I would really love to have some co-workers who look like me. There is this really old dude who lives on the same floor as me and he always asks me about where I work. One day he says "Are there a lot of OUR KIND there?" I said no. He said all fast and adamant "GOOD. Cause that just brings trouble. White people get the job done right. I never messed with none of them niggas when I was a janitor at the community college." He is straight up Mr. Ruckus. PRAISE WHITE JESUS!

And I've had a very irish sounding name. So I constantly get the… Good Ol’ Irish girl, What a surprise to meet you comments. Sometimes I get the "Well how'd you get such an irish name?" and depending on my mood that day I will sometimes look them straight in the face and say “At some point someone of Irish descent bought and sold my ancestors and attached their irish surnames to us.” That usually brings silence and or a change in subject.

Do you ever feel like a token or like my Mr. Ruckus?

I's married now!

I really couldn't ask for more... The wedding was beautiful and small and relaxed. Just how we wanted. Our friends threw a surprise backyard reception. I had so much fun.

His friend Oolie is a true angel. She put everything together and it was exactly what I had wanted!

He was and is the sweetest thing. He is sooooo mushy. It is so sweet.

The day was a little hectic. I spent 2 hrs in the barbershop to get Jr's hair cut (which was a certain groom's responsibility.) So because of that I didn’t get to have my mani and pedi. Thank God the dress was so long.

We got to the church on time and I did a little prep work in the ladies room. My friends and I sang "She's your Queen to Be" in the bathroom (a little loud because I heard laughter outside of the door) Everyone said most brides are bitchy but I was the silliest they've ever seen. Then as I touched up the baby hair with "Lets Jam" hair pomade the girls serenaded me with "JAM... OH JAM" (everything’s not for everybody google the group Guy if you need to)

I walked down the isle to my friend singing. The groom started to cry and turned his head. The ceremony was beautiful. The word SUBMIT appeared numerously throughout. But it's all good.

After the ceremony we went to his (our) friend Oolie's house b/c she wasn't able to make it and......... SURPRISE! She had thrown us a surprise reception. Complete with wedding cake (cupcake tier) and all. It was fabulous!

What other choice do you have... Really...

2 More days of being single... I'm excited and surprised to find out Mister is excited too! He rushes me off the phone last night to say "OMG! We are getting married" with a huge grin. I was like "Yeah... who would have known. I didn't even plan on staying with you this long cause i didn't think you were the marrying type." He agreed and said his friends can't believe it. But I can look at his stats

Mister
42yo
4 kids
4 different women (including me)
Mad child support
Constant bad times
Terrible gig

Me
30yo
1 child (with him)
Great job and moving up
Positive attitude

If you were him... what would be the point of putting yourself back on the market. You are a terrible liability and have nothing to offer someone new. Unless homegirl was…
- 42
- with 5 kids
- from 5 different men
- and getting no child support
- and couldn't find a job
- and never had a good day in her life

Then you'd look like Prince Charming

Why not marry me? I already love you and care about your situation. I can’t do anything to change that at this point...

The eyes are the window...

There are certain health issues that you don't really think about until something goes wrong and then when something goes wrong it is impossible for it to be a little something. Like your eyes. You don't think about eye HEALTH so much. You get your yearly exam so you can renew your contact prescription, or you want to change your look and go for new glasses. But when it is an actually health issue with your eyes it sucks!

My contacts created a scratch on my eye and OMG! Agony. It hurt to open my eye. It hurt to keep it closed. It burned and it stung and it ached. And it was BLOODSHOT. Like look me in my right eye... normal upstanding citizen. Look me in my left eye... straight up crackhead.

And this all started with vanity. I knew the trial pair the Dr gave me was not working out. But... I had bought these aviator shades and people were sweating me left and right... All my friends... Any where I went girls commenting on how hot they were. Driving down the street dudes beeping at me on every block. I HAD to have my shades on. Knowing that these contacts were not the right fit I was gonna wear them until I "had a chance to go back to the eye doctor."

Well... eventually I had no choice. I couldn't wait one more second. One of my tenants is an eye doctor. I ran in that office all frantic like "You gotta help me..." (LOL. I wonder how many times a week they hear that.) The lenses weren't not supplying my eyes with enough oxygen. Cells clustered under the surface = bump = scratch = me with the burning red eye = my nerdy glasses... no hotness no beeps... just my red eye and nerd glasses..

When will I ever learn?

I don't know how many times stories like this have to be told before people learn. In this instance people would mean me.

So Saturday night I go out with the girls to City Island for some seafood. On the ride back we start reminiscing about high school. We start talking about how much we used to drink and get totally fucked up. About how much we used to smoke and get totally fucked up. Most of the stories surrounded me because I was the one that had to be babysat once the alcohol showed up. So we also talked about who we didn't want to mess with b/c they weren’t clipped you know where... We talked about who did what to who on the kitchen counter when the parents drove up... We talked about it all. Oh and we talked and we laughed! It was an all around good ol time.

Monday morning. Boss comes in. Walks by and says

Boss - "Did you need me this weekend?"

Me - "No"

Boss- "You called me Saturday night around 11:00. I listened for a while but then thought it was a conversation I shouldn't be hearing and hung up"

Me (totally embarrassed) - "Uhhhhhh oops. I was out with the girls.... It was serious girl talk."

Boss- "Yeah I know. I told you I listened for a little while but it was something I knew I shouldn't hear so I hung up"

OMG! Mortified. Lock the keys on your blackberry before tossing it in your purse all willy nilly.

But then the same afternoon he did it while talking about his brother and one of the vendors called him and totally started talking about the whole convo he'd heard. That’s what he gets for listening to my naughty business huh?